To all parents: I mean, seriously

Let me preface this by saying I was that mom. Or I wasn’t that mom. However you want to classify my kind. You get me. The one that took her newborn to restaurants when he was 2 days old. The one that never asked one single person to wash their hands when they held the 6lb bundle. Yeah, over here, that’s me. I may have even picked up some cheerios off the floor and said, meh it’s still good, while stuffing them in the snack cup. As they got older, I threw drawings away, schoolwork, things they’d made—after sifting through and picking out my faves. Sentimental was certainly not my middle name. Let’s just say that.

Honestly, when Kelton started kindergarten I didn’t even cry. I was happy. I had a new freedom from 8-3 every day! Fast forward to today, and now Micah is in preschool 5 days a week 8:30-3. Oh the freedom!! How glorious it’s been! But, last week something happened. Micah said he didn’t want to go to school Monday. Wait, what?!?? Something stirred in me. Something I’ll credit to the Holy Spirit, but it literally changed my heart. In the same week I was offered a freelance graphic design job that may be “full-time-ish”. I haven’t worked since January 2009. Yes. 8 years of SAHM bliss.

When that sweet baby came to me and looked in my eyes with his big blues and said: mommy, can I stay home with you today? I didn’t hesitate. I said, “YES! We’ll have so much fun! We can go to the duck ponds, and ride your bike, and…” Now, this may all sound normal to you. But, previously I would’ve been a bit disappointed in losing my freedom. Not anymore. My patience has held tight. My emotions have run high. But, since he uttered those sweet little words that day I haven’t waivered on wanting to be with my kids every minute. We had the best day, just me and him. Just like the old days. Where are those days? Where did they go?

Trite, cliche, whatever you want to call it…but yes, those days are numbered for those of you with littles. I will have a 4th grader and kindergartener come August. 7 months from now. And, yes, I am getting sentimental and emotional.

I went and picked Kelton up at 11:20 today for no reason. Just so we could hang out. Hang out, we did. And it was also one of the best days ever. So please just remember, the days are messy img_1797and the nights are long, but the days are short and the years are shorter. I love my new heart for my kids. Don’t misunderstand me, I always loved being home with them, but never truly feel I cherished it until now. Until a voice whispered to me: remember they won’t always live here and they won’t always want to stay home. My eyes have been opened to the love they bring to me when they love me so fiercely and unconditionally. Through the bickering and the spills, the whining and screaming. The love, the sentiments, the joy. It’s there. It always was. It was just waiting to be whispered into my ear.


There is no good mom out there.

With Facebook, Pinterest and Instagram these days when most people see our posts of our kids cuddling or sharing great sibling moments or fun times at the splash park all we can think is,”Wow, she is so put together. She is so crafty. photo 2-1 She is so in shape. She is so ________(fill in the blank.” But let’s face it, we don’t post our kids screaming in the middle of Target or our kids yelling, “I HATE YOU!” for the first time or those awesome rainbow cupcakes we attempted from a Pinterest post that looked like mud. Why not? Why don’t we show that side of our lives? (more…)

When Tragedy Brings on the “WHY ME?”

I’ve had the privilege of meeting and getting to know many people in my 38 years. Lots more than some. But with the advantages of social media, I have had a bigger joy in getting to know people via Facebook, Twitter and/or Instagram more than ever and with those I’d lost touch with over the years. I have heard stories about their kids, seen their kids learn to talk, walk and graduate high school. It has been pretty awesome, when I think about it. They comment on my kids and my goings-on and vice versa. We share stories, and in that, we share our lives together.

But today—via social media—I found out some very tragic news about a former co-worker’s child. I haven’t seen or talked (in person) to her in over 7 years. Yet, we “chat” and post and “giggle” via our FB posts all the time. I know from working with her that she lost her husband to a heart attack when her son was young. She is still single and her son was around 19 or 20. Yet, he lost his life Saturday night in an accident.

Many people might say: Wow, how could a loving God do that to her? How could this happen?
A natural, human reaction I suppose. But I think we should look at it from another perspective. C.S. Lewis was right: None of us are immune from the hard parts of life. But when the storms come, God walks to us on the very waters that so frighten us. His word promises us: “The Lord sits enthroned over the flood; the Lord is enthroned as King forever.  The Lord gives strength to his people; the Lord blesses his people with peace” (Psalm 29:10-11).

So how can we see Him in a time like this? As our suffering is for Christ’s sake, so is our contentment. I truly believe that no other attribute of a Christian so sings the gospel than that of contentment. We should see it as an incredible opportunity … to glorify God with all our hearts, through this difficult time. That others might see Him and be drawn to Him as a result of her response to His providential hand in her life. It is through this grace, this love, this mercy, God will grant her the ability to have the strength, courage and faith to trust and obey God’s great call to glorify Him through this time.

So instead we should say, “He has used me to show those that He is there.” Even when we don’t see it. He is glorified, sometimes through our deepest sadness. That is Why YOU.

“We were promised sufferings. They were part of the program. We were even told, ‘Blessed are they that mourn’.”-C.S. Lewis